Okay mom and dad, today is your lucky day. I’m going to offer you $100 in cash if you can do a back handspring.
Right here. Right now.
Did you do it?
Of course not. Why not? Because unless you are a former gymnast who still dabbles in flips and tumbles in your spare time, you probably cannot do a back handspring. Not without breaking your neck. And that is NOT worth a $100!
So what’s your point, you ask? (No, I cannot do a back handspring either). The point is that you may be asking your child to do something he simply is not capable of doing.
Some parents look at their child as an unmotivated blob of a marionette connected to a PlayStation controller in one hand and a cell phone in the other. When it comes time for homework, your child acts as if he has been asked to solve the Sunday New York Times crossword puzzle. Excuses start pouring out and procrastination kicks into high gear.
You lament to yourself, “Geez, my child is so unmotivated.”
Maybe. Maybe not.
Could you do a back handspring? If you could not, does that mean you are unmotivated? Of course not.
Some children’s lack of perceived motivation is actually masquerading as a lack of Executive Functions skills i.e. the ability to plan, start and complete an assignment. Children with learning disabilities and attention deficit disorder are at a greater risk for Executive Functions issues. Dr. Deborah Stipek is the Dean of the Stanford University School of Education. She says kids will be self-motivated to learn when they:
- Feel competent about something
- Have some choice and control over their learning
- Believe that intelligence isn’t fixed at birth
- Feel loved and respected by their parents
Let’s look at each one:
Feeling confident about something comes from practice. Some children need direct instruction about how and when to do their homework. Help your child establish a homework routine by assigning a distraction-free location in the home and a time your child should be at the location.
Help your child gain control of the homework by establishing what order to complete the assignments. Estimate how long each assignment will take. Encourage her to start with an easy assignment to get going. Work on the most difficult subject next. Then finish with easier subject.
Getting your child to believe that intelligence isn’t fixed at birth is clearly a challenge. If he is struggling with schoolwork, he may have a poor self-image. But with your help, or by hiring a Learning Specialist, your child can learn the skills necessary to complete the classwork on a daily basis.
Feeling loved and respected by their parents ought to be the easiest one, right? But think back to your most recent interactions with your child during homework time. Has there been a lot of nagging and histrionics? You may feel your child has put you in a position where all you can do is nag and plead. Take a deep breath and try to implement the 5 to 1 rule: For every negative comment you give your child, make five positive ones. If you are struggling with finding positive things to say, mention small accomplishments. “I’m glad you got up when your alarm went off.” “Your guitar practice sounds great.”
Wrapping it up
Motivating a child who appears unmotivated can seem like a daunting challenge. Before declaring your child a lazy, no-good stick-in-the-mud, ask yourself whether your child has the proper Executive Functioning tools to be successful. Research shows that motivation increases with every successful encounter with a task. By providing your child with direct instruction on how to organize, manage and complete her schoolwork, you will help your child gain much needed confidence. And motivation.
To learn more about Executive Functioning skills and motivational strategies, contact a Learning Specialist at Engage the Brain.
Read MoreMany parents and students view the 4th quarter of the school year as a winding down process. In fact, many parents don’t even schedule a spring parent conference.
This is a mistake.
Take the opportunity to meet with your child’s teacher and learn about all the wisdom that he or she has gleaned about your child during the school year.
Spring parent conferences are different than fall ones. During fall conferences, the focus is typically on you, the parent, sharing with the teacher as much as you know about your child both as a student and as a person. This helps the teacher understand your child’s needs and what strategies have been successful in the past.
The spring conference presents a chance for the parent to understand what the teacher has learned about your child. After all, the teacher has now spent the last 8 months interacting with your kid on a daily basis.
Engage the Brain spoke with an Orange County Public Schools 4th grade teacher and asked why she thought spring conferences were important.
“Teachers get a different glimpse of their students from what parents see. Teachers sometimes see different strengths and weaknesses from what parents see at home, which can result in identification of possible concerns OR reassurances for parents who are worried. Children are typically at their most vulnerable at home (whatever that may look like for each child) because that is where they feel most comfortable. Just as adults may have a slightly different/more polished work persona than home persona, so too do many children.”
She added: “For best and most prepared teacher responses, pose one or two questions ahead of time (by sending an email, for example) to let the teacher know your expectations for the conference. Also, please be mindful of spring standardized testing dates; these tests often have far greater implications for teachers than students and can be a significant source of stress, no matter how well the teacher is managing it. Don’t add to that stress; contact a teacher after testing, or request a conference after testing.”
Parents of children with IEP’s or 504 Plans can use this opportunity to speak with your child’s teacher without a full child study team in attendance. Good questions to ask the teacher are:
What interventions have worked best with my child?
Did any interventions not work?
How can I help my child start the next school year strong?
Can you recommend some resources or games my child would benefit from using over the summer?
One final piece of advice from the O.C.P.S. teacher: Don’t request a specific teacher for the next school year. Teachers may not end up back in the grade they taught the previous year.
Wrapping it up
Even if you child has had a great school year, take the opportunity to schedule a spring parent teacher conference. It is a wonderful time to learn more about how your child is progressing academically, socially and emotionally, all equally important. Spring conferences provide the chance to compare what the teacher sees at school versus what you see at home AND the occasion to start addressing any troubling discrepancies.
What are you waiting for? Prepare a few questions and schedule the conference!
David Karch (Learning Specialist with Engage the Brain)
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It’s spring break! Congratulations, parents. You are about three quarters of the way through the school year. You and your family deserve a little down time.
What are your plans for the week off? Take a trip to the beach? Catch up on chores around the house? Perhaps go to the theme parks?
Whatever activities you plan for the family, you can still sneak in a little learning. The trick is disguising the learning. Here is an example:
Our scene opens in your kitchen…
Your son invites his two buddies to play mini golf and you are the only cool parent willing to put up with three middle school boys for a few hours in public.
You: How much does it cost to play?
Son replies in painful 12-year old agony: How should I know?
You: Is the Tahiti Island (all mini golf course names have tropical references) open during the week?
Son (same painful agony in voice): How should I know?
You (holding hands behind your back to avoid contact to son’s person): How can we find out?
Son: You can Google it.
You: No, YOU can Google it.
Son: Okay.
End of scene
Congratulations! You have just encouraged your child to use technology for a productive reason. Your son will be reading, calculating the costs of the golf, and learning about the hours of operation of a business. Looking at a website can be as challenging as some reading passages that your child is encountering in school.
Once you learn how to sneak in the learning, most any activity can be camouflaged as a fun outing but still yield some educational benefit. Engage the Brain has selected some popular spring break activities AND demonstrated how to sprinkle in a little sneaky learning.
Spring Break Activities
Bowling
Bowling equals math. Even though most modern bowling alleys have automated scoring systems, it is still fun to keep your own score. Plus, each frame is based on ten pins. Your child will constantly be calculating how many more pins she needs to knock down to equal ten, all while chasing that illusive spare. Questions to sneak in while bowling can include: How far away from 100 are you? How far ahead of your sister are you? Will you and your sister’s combined score beat mine? (I actually stink at bowling but thought it was a good question to include).
Scenic Boat Tour
Packing up the family and heading out on a scenic boat tour on one of your regions’ lakes is a great way to sneak in some science and geography. Here in Florida, we are fortunate to have airboat rides that are like taking a spin around a NASCAR track on water. Before heading out on a boat tour, research what animals and vegetation you may see. The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission has a great website. Give your kids a pad of paper and allow them to create a chart to track the animals they see. If your kids need a little encouragement, make it a contest. For example, whichever family member spots the most alligators would win a small prize. If you live in Michigan, that would be quite a contest! Or you can just make it Wolverines.
Bring the Kids to work
Depending on your occupation, and your child’s age, sex, mood, and her friends’ spring break schedules, bringing your child to work may be a good rainy day activity. Recent research has shown that children who have more general knowledge do better in school, and do particularly better in science, than those students with less general knowledge. One way to build that knowledge is through constant exposure to new material. No matter your occupation – just think if you were an airboat driver – there are plenty of learning opportunities available. Discuss how your job functions within the company as a whole, how your company functions within your industry and how your company functions in the broad economy. Taking your child out to lunch or ice cream never hurts either.
Visit your Lego Store
Legos are still an amazing toy that packs tons of learning into all that colored plastic. Legos develop fine motor skills, creative planning, engineering and persistence. During the break, take your child to your local Lego Store. On March 19 and March 26 the stores are holding a special Lego Club Meeting event. It is a great opportunity for your child to meet other Lego enthusiasts and build a fun project. Click the link for more details.
Family picnic
Planning a family picnic can be as much fun as actually going on a family picnic. First, you need to motivate your child by asking him his favorite picnic snacks. After he rattles off five or six disgusting, unhealthy options (that secretly sound delicious), reach a compromise by suggesting a few healthy alternatives. Prepare the foods with your child. Cooking is filled with learning: Reading the recipes, using the measuring cups and spoons and following directions. Finally, you must decide where to go on your picnic. Encourage your child to research parks and other outdoor areas in your town. Do you see that? That is your child running to the computer to read for a purpose.
Wrapping it up
Spring Break is a great time to reconnect with the family and participate in some fun activities. But just because the kids are off of school does not mean the learning must stop. On the contrary, by using subterfuge and creativity, just about any family fun outing can be tweaked to include some educational benefit. By encouraging your child to read for a purpose, apply math concepts in real-world applications and answer a few well-camouflaged questions, your spring break can be fun, relaxing and rewarding.
David Karch (Learning Specialist with Engage the Brain)
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At Engage the Brain, we are all about helping students and families: A. Get back on track, B. Stay on track and or C. Explore the tracks in more detail. Put another way, we provide families with: interventions, solutions and or enrichment opportunities.
A few weeks ago we posted a blog about Following Directions and provided some fun activities for parents to do with their child. This week we are going to suggest some of the best Podcasts for Kids to continue practicing listening skills in an entertaining way.
In this digital age when everyone (including children) is discussing the latest celebrity tweet and or viral video, one digital communication channel tends to get ignored: Podcasts. They are NOT as “shareable” or “consumable;” two must haves in today’s 162-character environment. But, often times they are rich in content.
Podcasts are great entertainment ideas if your family is traveling by car for any distance. Children can listen to them before bed to help settle down and prepare for a good night’s sleep. Or, after dinner, after all the homework is done and the dishes are put away, gather the family in the living room and listen to an exciting story told by real actors. Use of one’s listening skills and imagination is necessary to fully enjoy the podcasts.
Pause the podcast at natural breaks in the story or wait till the end and discuss the content with your child. Ask questions to determine his understanding of the topic. Try to start conversations. And share your thoughts too.
So, what are the best kid’s podcasts? Glad you asked! Engage the Brain selected 7 Podcasts from different entertainment categories. There is a link to each and brief summary of the content.
Best Kid’s Podcasts
Storynory – Stories range from myths and fairy tales to mysteries and humor. There are literally 100’s to choose from.
Stories Podcast – A wide range of stories are told in dramatic readings including the classics like Peter Rabbit and original stories.
Story Pirates – This great podcast uses cool sound effects to enhance the stories being told by “first-rate actors and comedians.”
Old Time Radio Nostalgia – This podcast uses actors and techniques that recreate radio shows that were popular before the invention of television.
Brains On– This fantastic podcast focuses on science and discussing how things work. It delves into gastrointestinal distress – think smelly noisesJ – and how a GPS unit works.
Astronomy Cast – This podcasts explores the cosmos and everything in outer space.
Classics for Kids – This podcast introduces kids to classical music in an entertaining way. In addition to the music, information about the composers is presented in a fun way too.
Wrapping it up
Everyone’s listening skills can be better. Many people have selective hearing… tuning in only when they need or want something. (Dads and kids tend to be guilty of this.) Listening to podcasts is a wonderful way to enrich your child in literature, music and science AND practice listening skills. Make sure you discuss the podcast; just listening to them is not enough. As a family, begin with the Best Podcasts for Kids listed above. Once your family finds one they like, it won’t be long before they find podcasts they love.
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When you were a kid, what was your favorite toy? I had two: My Evil Knievil stunt wind up motorcycle and my tiger striped drum set. Like most boys who grew up in the 70’s, I wanted to jump over greyhound buses just like Evil Knievil, But after a few bad outcomes trying to launch myself over an overturned garbage can using a homemade ramp on my Schwinn Stingray, I decided my tiger striped drum set might be a better option.
Today, kids have so many options when it comes to choosing a toy. Fortunately and unfortunately, electronics has infiltrated the world of play. Fortunately because there are some awesome toys that integrate technology to combine learning and play in a seamless fashion. Unfortunately because some video games are so fun that kids don’t want to explore other options for play.
Why should you disconnect the video games and encourage your child to play with toys? Stevanne Auerbach, known as Dr. Toy says, “Play reduces stress, improves self-expression, supports emotional development, strengthens physical development and much more.” If somebody known as Dr. Toy says toys are good for kids, then I’m all in.
The Creativity Institute divides toys into four categories:
Toys for physical or muscle development such as wagons, bikes, boxes, puzzles, blocks, brooms, and shovels.
Toys for sensory (touch, sight, sound, taste, smell) development such as water toys, musical instruments, bubbles, play dough, and sand toys.
Toys for make-believe and social development such as dolls, dress-up clothes, cars, trucks, games, and books.
Toys for creative and intellectual development such as clay, crayons, paints, books, paper, and scissors.
The Child Development Institute says, “The best toys engage a child’s senses, spark their imaginations and encourage them to interact with others.” To that end, Engage the Brain has gathered a selection of toys for parents to consider purchasing for their child. Rather than link to specific toys with exact prices, we are going to offer categories for parents to contemplate buying.
Toys
Models – Good old-fashioned models build patience, direction following and fine motor skills. There are cars, planes, boats and buildings to name a few.
Science kit – Science kits are offered in a variety of age ranges. The best ones come with tools such as microscopes and activities and experiments that are well written and easily followed by the child.
Magic kit – Magic kits can provide a lifetime of play. These kits usually introduce kids to some of the secrets of magic such as sleight of hand and optical illusions. And who doesn’t love a good card trick?
Terrariums – These offer wonderful opportunities to learn about plant and flower growth. If you are an adventurous parent, you can introduce critters into the terrarium as well. Children learn about life cycles and nutrients that are necessary to sustain life.
Cooking kit – My daughter had an Easy Bake Oven; though there really wasn’t much baking going on. As technology has developed, cooking kits have become more sophisticated and offer real learning opportunities about the culinary arts.
Train set – Train sets can provide hours of entertainment. In addition to running the trains, a child can build models to add to his community. Changing the landscape by season can keep tour child interacting with the trains year round.
Legos – Legos have come a long way since the 1970’s! Simply put, visit any store – online or brick and mortar – and your child will find a wonderful toy that will provide hours of building and learning.
Wrapping it up
Toys provide learning opportunities and benefits that can last a lifetime. Think about your favorite toy from your childhood; I bet you remember it. Toys can act as a springboard to learning more about a topic. (My tiger striped drum set morphed into a full professional drum kit I play to this day). Together with your child decide what type of toy interests him and check out a few options. Then watch as your child’s imagination and creativity come to life.
David Karch (Learning Specialist with Engage the Brain)
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Every parent has experienced that frightening moment when you bring your first child home from the hospital and realize there is no owner’s manual. There she sits, three days old, in the car seat on the kitchen table. Now what?
Some how you manage to make it through the first two years, and now you are confronted with the “Terrible Twos.” You want your kid to put on his sweatshirt because it is chilly outside. Your son doesn’t want to even wear a shirt. It is the beginning of the strive for independence in your child, and it NEVER LETS UP.
Fast-forward ten years and your child is in middle school. She brings home an “F” on a science test. You ask for an explanation and your daughter says, “It was a surprise test and everyone in the class failed. Mr. (fill in the name) is such a jerk. Nobody likes him.”
How you handle these two scenarios can help determine which type of parent you are: helicopter or free range. According to Wikipedia, Helicopter parents are overprotective and take an over excessive interest in their child’s life. Free Range parents encourage children to function independently in proper accordance of their age of development with a reasonable acceptance of realistic personal risks.
The idea of Free Range parenting came to attention when a mother in New York City allowed her then nine-year-old son to ride the subway unattended, then wrote about it in a book.
Like most things in life, striking a balance seems to be the best approach. At Engage the Brain we witness, on an almost daily basis, the results of the different approaches to parenting. Being the detached professionals that we are – we never have these issues with our children! – this is the advice we give to the parents in our practice:
Parental Advice:
Encourage your child to advocate for him or her self.
Allowing your child the opportunity to solve a problem first builds self-esteem and a sense that they can control the outcome of a situation.
Allow a child to fail
Always bailing your child out does not teach him responsibility. Many parents we talk to tell us that their child wants to be independent and not be “nagged” by mom and dad. You must allow your child to succeed OR fail on their own. Failure has a way of motivating a person to try harder the next time.
A planner is mandatory
Many of the children we work with struggle with Executive Functions issues. At the core of the issue is organization and time management. Parents report their child never turns in homework, forgets to bring home the right text book, didn’t know there was a test today, etc. REQUIRING your child to use some version of a planner is critical for sustained success. We wrote a blog, In Defense of a School Planner , which outlines all the reasons to use one.
Wrapping it up
In reality there are as many different types of parenting styles as there are parents. Whether you tend to hover like an action news helicopter covering a car chase or lay off like a free range animal enjoying your large expanse and mountain views, there is some common ground to meet on. Helping your child to gain independence is the goal. By encouraging your child to advocate for herself, requiring her to use a planner and when necessary allowing her to fail, you are providing her the tools she will need to live a happy and successful life.
David Karch (learning Specialist with Engage the Brain)
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“A Penny saved is a penny earned” remarked Benjamin Franklin over 200 years ago. As smart as Ben Franklin was – the man discovered electricity! – even he could not have foreseen the average American amassing over $160,000 in debt. And according to NerdWallet, of that total, $15,355 is credit card debt.
The balance of the $160,000 is mortgage, automobile and student loans. That debt is the price of being a productive adult.
So, let’s focus on the credit card debt. Much research points out that money spending habits begin to form in children as early as elementary school and become entrenched by high school. It doesn’t take Sherlock Holmes and Watson to discover that money-forming habits are taken from the home. This means you, mom and dad. Put another way, monkey see monkey do.
I am not here to judge. If you and yours are bucking the consumer debt total up, that is your business. But wouldn’t it be nice to send your children out into the world armed with some basic money management skills? Like spend less than you make?
Engage the Brain researched 5 websites that teach money management skills in a fun way to kids. Check them out:
Practical Money Skills – This website offers money advice for kids, parents and teachers. There is a great game section where the site has partnered with the NFL and FIFA that teaches money skills to kids while they play a computerized football or futbol game.
Rich Kid Smart Kid – This website is loaded with games to teach kids about the value of money. There is a page for a parent with lesson plans to help extend the learning beyond the video games on the site.
Change Maker – This fun game for elementary age kids is found on the funbrain website. The game practices making change for a certain amount of money. It offers escalating levels of difficulty by making change for totals less than a dollar, under $5.00 and under $100. Players earn money in their piggy banks for correct answers. The game even allows for different countries currencies – Canada, Mexico and England.
biz kids – The slogan on this site is “no homework, no school, just games.” The games are appropriate for upper elementary school and middle schools age kids. These games are more about financial strategy and running a virtual business. Kids learn what owning a business entails.
Citi Group – Citi Group has a section on its website devoted to teaching children about financial literacy. There are interactive games for elementary age students and middle/ high school age students. Each game has printable resources for parents to extend the learning beyond the computer screen.
Wrapping it up
Spending habits are formed early in life. Like all habits, good ones are as hard to break as bad ones. Help your child form good financial habits early in life. By introducing financial terms and sound money management fundamentals, you will help your child successfully navigate his way through the difficult world of debt and savings.
David Karch (Learning Specialist with Engage the Brain)
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For many of us, January signals an opportunity to start over, resolve to do things differently or hopefully better. And for parents, many of our resolutions involve our children.
How can we better help our kids achieve success and perform to the best of their ability?
One thing we hear about from parents at Engage the Brain is the lack of enrichment opportunities at their children’s schools. Whether programs have been scaled back to better prepare for high stakes tests, or school budgets have squeezed enrichment activities out of the school day. The bottom line is that quality enrichment programs are now left to parents.
The good news is we live in Central Florida, and we have an abundance of indoor and outdoor cultural activities available 12 months a year. You just have to know where to look.
Engage the Brain has done the heavy lifting for you. (You are welcome:-) Below is a list of 10 wonderful activities and programs you can explore with your child, each with a link to more information.
Central Florida Enrichment Activities
Blue Spring Park in January is home to the manatees. Located about 45 minutes east of Orlando in Orange City, the park is a temporary retreat for manatees that enjoy the warm springs water. There are great observation decks and a restaurant that features pancakes.
Go ice-skating at the RDV Sportsplex in Maitland. It’s great exercise and will give “transplant” parents from up north a chance to relive their skating days when they were a kid.
The Orlando History Center is located right in downtown Orlando. Exhibits include Destination Florida detailing 100 years of tourism before Disney; First People describing Native American life pre-European Florida; and an Aviation exhibit which includes a replica WW11 bomber.
Orange County Public Library has many wonderful programs for kids. Programs include kidsconnect that connects you to everything in the library for children; tweens prescribes activities for kids that are “too old for kids stuff and too young for teen stuff,” and Informed Teens, which details activities about gaming events and book clubs.
Take in a play at the Orlando Repertory Theater located in downtown Orlando in Loch Haven Park. If your child is interested in acting, the theater offers classes, camps and workshops.
The Mennello Museum of American Art is located across the street from the Orlando Rep Theater in Loch Haven Park. Every second Sunday of each month offers free admission to the galleries, mini-tours and the opportunity for your child to make a craft.
The Home Depot offers free woodworking programs on the first Saturday of each month. Knowledgeable Home Depot staff provides all the materials, tools and expert advice.
Engineering for Kids is an after school program that teaches STEM – Science, Technology, Engineering and Math lessons. The programs are conducted in local schools. Check the website for participating schools and details about the classes.
Stand Up Paddleboarding has grown in popularity over the past year or two. Paddleboard Orlando offers a great beginner rental package that tours the Winter Park Chain of Lakes. And with Florida’s temperate winters, January is good time to try it out. If you get hooked, they sell boards and equipment too!
Is your child a budding musician? If so, School of Rock in Oviedo may be a great after school program for your kid. Musicians are placed in a band with peers of like ability. Through the guidance of working musicians, the band practices and eventually plays at a concert for family and friends.
Wrapping it up
Enrichment activities present opportunities for children to learn more about the world around them. In Central Florida, we are fortunate to have array of family-friendly activities available year round. Brainstorm with your child a list of her interests, then pick one of the links above and begin exploring. Who knows… while enriching your child, you may end up enriching and tightening your family bond.
David Karch (Learning Specialist at Engage the Brain)
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